Why you are better off not letting praise or blame affect you
"The wind cannot shake a mountain. Neither praise nor blame moves the wise man."
– Gautama Buddha
In a world where feedback is constant, Gautama Buddha’s timeless advice remains strikingly relevant: be like a mountain, unmoved by praise or blame.
Growing up, many of us were taught that encouragement was vital for development. And while support fosters growth, Buddha offered a deeper teaching — that true wisdom lies not in seeking approval nor shrinking from criticism.
Approval often feels like a warm breeze. It lifts us, energizes us, and gives us reason to reach higher. Praise from those we admire can be especially potent, fueling ambition and courage.
Yet just as easily, disapproval can feel like a storm. Harsh words and criticism can weigh us down, dimming enthusiasm and clouding self-worth.
Buddha’s counsel invites us to anchor ourselves beyond these passing winds. Neither the sweetness of praise nor the sting of blame should dictate our inner state. To be truly wise is to remain steady, aware, and unaffected by either.
Why praise can mislead us
A simple analogy offers insight. Observe a dog delighted by praise — wagging its tail, eager to repeat whatever behavior earned approval. Praise conditions a response, reinforcing action through external reward.
As humans, however, we are not meant to live at the mercy of constant external validation. Maturity involves acting from inner conviction, not merely performing for applause.
When we rely too heavily on praise, we tether our self-worth to others' opinions. We begin to doubt our value unless it is mirrored back to us through compliments and accolades. Such dependence weakens resilience and clouds true self-understanding.
True confidence arises not from being told we are enough, but from knowing it innately.
Why blame should not unseat us
Blame, like praise, can also manipulate our emotions if we let it.
Constructive feedback has its place; it helps refine our actions and understanding. But much of the criticism we encounter in life is neither fair nor helpful. Often, blame is more about the speaker's frustrations than our actual faults.
If we allow every negative comment to pierce us, we surrender stability. We become reactive rather than centered.
Instead, we can recognize blame as another gust of wind — sometimes cold, sometimes fierce — but ultimately harmless to a well-rooted mountain.
Be like a mountain in the wind
Imagine yourself as a mountain. Rain, snow, and winds may swirl around it, but it remains unwavering. The mountain accepts weather without resistance yet stands unchanged.
In daily life, this means acknowledging praise and blame without absorbing them. We hear words, recognize them as events passing through awareness, but we don't grant them power over our inner peace.
When someone praises you, say thank you. When someone criticizes you, consider whether there’s wisdom to extract — and if not, let it go. Either way, remain steady, unmoved.
Just as you are not obligated to keep an unwanted gift, you are not obliged to accept every judgment or accolade handed to you.
Freedom beyond approval and blame
From a Buddhist perspective, clinging to approval or recoiling from blame stirs craving and dissatisfaction. These emotions bind us to suffering and generate further karmic entanglements.
Freedom lies in equanimity — in not being blown about by the winds of others’ opinions.
When the winds of judgment howl, remember: you are not the weather.
You are the mountain.
